46 and Fabulous!

This week I’m celebrating my “Birth Week”.

I started doing this, to varying degrees, many years ago; before the “realities” of life could convince me that I didn’t deserve more than a passing mention once a year. My lovingly quirky family had convinced me at a very early age that the Flag Day parade was really in honor of my birthday, and I would stand on the roadside waving at the marchers, so excited that everyone, it seemed, in the whole world had come out just for me! It was in that youthful innocence that I truly believed in the marvel of myself and that of course the occasion of my birth was something that could not be justly celebrated in only one day.

As I got older I started resenting the parades. I felt foolish for my childhood naiveté and began to withdrawl from overt displays of festivity. Remember how embarassing everything your family did was during those snarky young adult years?

By the time I’d reached my thirtys I had eased into the widly accepted once-a-year-and-please-no-singing-waitstaff mode. Demurely accepting greetings and hoping to skip the monthly office birthday party. In my own quiet ways though I always kept the week-long celebration.

Now, firmly entrenched in my forties I’ve decided to revisit the Birth Week celebration.

I have a friend who celebrates her entire Birth Month and a couple of friends who celebrate their Half-Birthdays, mid way through the year. These women wholly accept their magnificence without pretence or false modesty. They know what we all need to remember – that when we allow ourselves to feel fully appreciated, we are best able to fully appreciate others.

So this year I’m again allowing myself to be appreciated for the week. Who knows, maybe next year I’ll try the whole month!

See ya at the parade…

Vacation Meltdown

I recently took some time off from my business. First a week to recuperate from a nasty cold, then a couple of weeks to go on the first real vacation we’ve been on in about 12 years.

I wasn’t prepared for how I reacted on returning to my office after such an absence. My initial reaction was to be completely overwhelmed by the stacks of paperwork that seem to magically appear when the office door is closed. But what really suprised me was my next reaction – I just wanted to shut the door and putter around the house and garden – really “bury my head in the sand”!

Thankfully I had a session scheduled with my coach for that afternoon, and she introduced the idea that rather than forcing myself to jump right back in to the business routine I take the remainder of the week (only a day and a half anyway) and ease back into my lifestyle. After all, as an entrepreneur it was completely up to me how I designed my business and my life.

I realized that this was the first time I had ever been on vacation on my own terms instead of as someone else’s employee and as such I really cared about what happened while I was away. We discovered that my reactions were based in my unrealistic expectations of myself and a fear of facing up to them.

So now I’m easing back into my routine and trying to remember that this lifestyle I’m designing for myself is a work in progress and I have the permission to change it any time I choose.

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